Tuesday 1 December 2009

Love Stories - My Parents


(image from here via weheartit)

When it comes to marriage my parents are a huge inspiration to me. They had a horrible start to their marriage but they made it work and they are a true partnership.

My parents met very young, my Mum was 18 and Dad 19, they hadn’t been together very long when my Mum fell pregnant. (It is one of my Mum’s biggest parental achievements that she got her three daughters past 19 without being pregnant, we had safe sex drilled into us). My Dad immediately stepped up to the mark and was willing to stand by his woman – they’d made a mistake but he wasn’t going to run away. My Mum however didn’t want to pressure him into the marriage. She refused to get married and dug her heels in. Unfortunately my grandparents were of the old fashioned variety and kicked her out of the house. What she went through in those few months make my heart ache every time I hear about it (horrendous bed-sits and a very strange land lady). She eventually was just too exhausted and talked things through with my Dad and they agreed to marry. They agreed that they would divorce after one year and my Dad would have as much access to the baby as he wanted.

So at 19 years old and 6 months pregnant my Mum met my Dad at the registry office and they made it official. There are very few pictures of their wedding because it was such a horrid time for them both – they have only just started celebrating their wedding anniversary (and as they don't know about the blog I can't really ask them for photos). The pictures that there are shows my Mum in a bottle green skirt suit – and when I say skirt, only just. This was the late ‘60s and my Mum at 6 months pregnant wore a mini skirt to her wedding (to be fair she barely had any bump and she looked fantastic). During their first year of marriage my Dad worked 3 jobs while studying for a degree. My Mum tried to cope with a new baby and study for her own degree. I guess they never got round to getting a divorce. They are still together 42 years later, I think as time went on they fell in love, and their love has continued to grow. They have had some really tough times, when I left for university, leaving them with an empty nest I thought they would split up.

However what actually happened was that they suddenly started to enjoy each other a lot more. They holiday a lot, they both work from home (although they are both allegedly retired) they just seem to have a great time together. (My sisters and I joke about them spending our inheritance but we are all just happy that they are happy).

I want to have a marriage like my parents although O and I have had a significantly better start. What I want is the partnership that they have, the belief that you can go through some tough times and still come out the other side with a happier and stronger marriage.

8 comments:

  1. Love this story... ok, the details aren't so lovely (and can't imagine what your Mum must have gone through) but I love the happy ending :)

    My own parents' marriage is certainly an inspiration to me but in that I never want my relationship to be like theirs was. (They had a pretty similar start to your folks but with less happiness along the way.)

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  2. Such a lovely story. Thanks for sharing it. Relationships do take work, and it sounds like they've been willing to work at it. You must be very proud of them.

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  3. i liked reading this story. it's very real. my parents had it rough too. but i love the ending :) (and when she's wearing the bottle green mini skirt suit.) thanks for sharing their story.

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  4. I teared up reading this. I love when people stay together, happily, against the odds.

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  5. Thank you so much for sharing your parent's story. It's a very moving account of triumph over adversity. What wonderful folks you have. What a privilege for you.

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  6. thank you all for your lovely comments about my parents. I might be biased but I think they are pretty fantastic.

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  7. It does seem like they were meant to be together. Such a beautiful story.

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  8. This is such a good tale for modern times! It's so tempting to think true love is immediate and comes easily but I love stories like these where couples take a slightly different path and there's a happy ending. And how many are still together after 42 years? Inspiring really. Especially when I'm bickering with my boyfriend about washing up!

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